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Saturday, July 17, 2010

Commitment

Today I've been pondering the dilemma of Bella in the Twilight series (actual text). Though she has many side issues, the largest fear for her is commitment. Oh, she has no issues committing to a life as a vampire, but has a huge fear of marriage. I am only half way through Eclipse, and I know I cannot fully comment until the end, but this discussion is about our own troubles with commitment.

Most of us have no issues with those things that are risky, daring, or perhaps not in our best interest. We can easily commit to eating burgers because we tell ourselves they taste good. (Yes, they do, but perhaps not the healthiest choice for us). We often commit to bad habits without even a second thought. We find ourselves committing to that television show or shows every week saying we must simply keep up. We commit to that sports event as if it were God on earth, saying we must show support of our local team.

However, when it comes time to commit to a personal relationship be it a spouse, lover, friend, child, or such we often find ourselves with a host of reasons why we cannot make that commitment. We have no time. We have lots of work. There are things to be done. Some of us would rather jump from a plane, shalom down Mt. Everest, or swim the Amazon before we would dare to commit ourselves to another person.

Giving this much thought, I feel that the greatest influence on our lack of commitment is fear. It is the fear that we will be rejected, or even if accepted that we will never measure up to the expectations of the other person involved. It appears that most of the time those expectations are imagined. The other person accepts us for exactly who we are, who we were, and who we become. It is something to meditate upon as we journey, because we are never on this path alone. We must remember that if another expresses love for us, be it a spouse, lover, friend, or child that they mean it. They desire to love us, and that we are just fine the way we are. We must not allow fear to keep us from making that commitment.

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